funny things to say when you get pulled over

If youre in the far. )

Same night, different state, different cop, upon being pulled over in a hospital driveway:

Cop: Could I see your license and registration?

Me: *picks up license, registration, and previous speeding ticket from seat, starts to hand it to cop, notices ticket just in time, puts it back down before handing rest to cop*

Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?

Me: I have no idea. I thought you were pulling me over because Im soooo drunk! If youre an 86 year-old grandmother with a large Bible on the front seat, youll probably get a laugh from the officer for this one. If I guess correctly will you let me go with a warning? Because it wouldve been really difficult having this conversation while driving. Stick to the script, instead. Because its the end of the month and you havent met your ticket quota. He'd either die laughin', or smack the holy hell out of ya. When I get pulled, I place both hands on the top of the wheel and wait for the officer to give me instructions, which I follow explicitly.

The more at ease you put them, the less you have to worry about.

Since that's my philosphy, I was flabbergasted when I was riding with a friend that was doing about 15 over in Central Texas.

When we get pulled the cop asked him if he was in a race. In that case, you are suspected of doing something, and it's their job to try to get you to admit to it or to say a bit too much and incriminate yourself. "

"You can't get from Maine to Vermont by going through . All Rights Reserved. When you give the license to the cop, pull out a red clown nose, and slip it on. I just contradicted myself! I suspect they've missed it by now. They have become internet sensations with their script and STFU slogan, amassing hundreds of thousands of followers of Instagram and Facebook. Several prominent media publishers across the U.S. are dropping the comic strip after Adams described people who are Black as members of "a racist hate group" during an online video show. What's so funny is that the cop's partner says, "He's got a point." Pull into a parking lot if it's close or make sure you are as far away from traffic as possible. Remember, when getting pulled over, a police officer is trying to build a case against you right away. Basically, if they've got nothing on you, they have to let you go. Its a public safety issue for me so over the past few months Ive been putting together my business Arizona Alliance Traffic Survival Schools LLC. Cops hate that! That, in a nutshell, is the advice that Southern California attorneys Marc and Craig Wasserman have been enthusiastically sharing with the cannabis community for more than two decades. Remember, when getting pulled over, a police officer is trying to build a case against you right away. The advice that follows boils down to two key points: 1) pull over to a safe area and 2) dont do or say anything that will make the officer think youre a threat. The issuing officer does not show for your court date. If its dark, you should also put on your dome light. Telling falsehoods will only compound your problem. "

After a short pause the cop gets back into his car and drives away Wow, BJ. It might not be the best way to get yourself a warning, but if youre certain youll get a ticket anyway, you shouldnt say anything that will give any indication of guilt. Ive spent many hours riding along with traffic enforcement officers. I dont know why you stopped me. This one is always a smart move. That will give the impression you have something to hide. The officer understands what youre doing. The second line of the script allows you to preserve your rights to remain silent and not incriminate yourself. View image: /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif, Wave your hand and say:

"You don't need to see my identification. Pull over and give the police officer some space. Your email address will not be published. Turn it on and try to pull over other cars while he tries to pull you over.
Have a road-side ticket-party.

If you have one of those cars that let you down fold down the backseat to get into the trunk, have one of your friends climb in there and make whimpering noises.

Feign a foreign language. Dont say Im sorry I was speeding If you do get pulled over, says one former police officer, never acknowledge that you were, in fact, speeding. Dont slam on the brakes and for crying out loud, do NOT pull into the left shoulder or median. The zoo is closed today, and you wanted to let me know before I got there? I live in Arizona and Im a certified traffic survival school instructor. Image by Ildar Sajdejev via GNU Free License. Once youve pulled over, they may ask you to take a breathalyzer test. This article originally appeared on 09.12.17. Let him know that he's not about to get smoked by some speeder on a desolate stretch of highway, leaving a widow and orphans and they're strangely forgiving. Off of what? Try to be inconspicuous about it. he first thing you should be concerned with when getting pulled over is safety. If theres a safer and more lightly traveled side street up ahead, put on your turn signal and pull over. "

"These aren't the droids you're looking for. If you say yes but admit to speeding, you just drastically decrease the number of ways you can defend yourself. If youre on a. road with wide shoulders, pull off as soon as you can safely do so without brake checking the officer behind you. Webthe Policeman pulled him over, got out of his Patrol Car, and arrested the driver for having an illegal Firearm. Just leave your ego at home. Although the script was originally developed for medical marijuana patients and providers, the Wassermans say that anyone can use it to protect their rights. Some people ask it slightly differently: Am I being detained? Among the things police are allowed to do during a stop include: Ask to see your driving licence, insurance certificate or MOT certificate. I was giving my girlfriend a ride, and I had just picked her up. Marc and Craig Wasserman, the Pot Brothers at Law, in their Southern California office. Putting the seat belt on after youve been pulled over is a dead giveaway and will just attract attention to yourself. You: With all due respect, sir, I do not wish to say anything which might incriminate myself. We'll go easier on you if you let us." "

Cop shines his flashlight on the road. A factual error on the ticket itself (your license plate number, name, date, or other inarguable fact is incorrect) may get you off the hook. Imagine how many people an officer pulls over in a month. "
you: "Coz you think I have donuts? Most officers decide whether youre getting a ticket or a warning before they even approach your vehicle. Your safety, the officers safety, and the safety of all the people around you laughing because youre getting pulled over (yes, you still need to be concerned with their safety, too). ID. Knowing your rights can help prevent a traffic stop from turning into a DUI conviction. "

Me - "Uhyeah. I look up and open my mouth, and I spew my lunch over his jacket and pants.

After I was done, I looked at him and said "Sorry about your pants, but I told you I didn't feel well. Well, you have rights when you're pulled over. When youre pulled over, explain to the officer that you saw the hubcap fall off a car ahead. You can use the. When someone asks how you know a mutual friend, say, Beetle fighting.. View image: /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Roughly a month after I got my first driver's license a friend and I were pulled over in my car for speeding. 24. You see, were on our way to our honeymoon. This excuse has got more than one couple out of a ticket. I had my hands in plain view, the window rolled down, and when he asked me where I was going, I said, "I'm guun to ssssschooo wi mah gurrl frun' You see, the novacaine hadn't worn off yet, my tongue was totally dead, as was half of my face. True anecdotes:

Cop: Do you know how fast you were going back there?

Me: No, officer. he asks me. It will be hard in the moment, with your adrenaline pumping, your freedom in question, and when you're possibly in physical danger, depending on the cops involved and your skin color. 2. Highway Patrol A man purchased a new Mercedes to celebrate his wife leaving him and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. How To Stay Fit And Healthy During Super Bowl Season, How To Replace Your Failing SSD In Under An Hour Without Losing Any Data, How To Grill The Perfect Steakhouse Steak, How to Survive A Week In The Middle Of Nowhere, How To Cook The Perfect Lobster At Home And Impress Your Date, Lil Waynes Miami Beach Mansion Hits The Market At $29.5 Million, Check Out This Incredible $169 Million NYC Penthouse Thats Up For Sale, Bentley Designs A Luxury Yacht Interior To Match The Owners Continental GT, Automotive Designer Ian Callum Rethinks The Iconic Eames Lounge Chair, In-N-Out Burger Heiress Lists L.A. There are certain things you are required by law to say or give to an officer after getting pulled over. Never say anything that might incriminate yourself even if you have to tell the officer, I do not want to incriminate myself. That is not an admission of guilt. 11. Im so glad youre here, officer! She rolled a stop sign. Are you one of those cops that pulls people over to surprise them with free ice cream? Either way, you drastically reduce your chance of getting a ticket.

So, anyway, he gave us directions - which were wrong - and told us how to get to the nearest open gas station - which was closed - and we eventually found our way back to Vermont

Then there was always:

Cop: Well, I'll let you off with a warning this time, because you have a clean driving record.

Me: I have a clean driving record??? WebThere are of course large modes of transportation, but in this lesson I'll focus on the ways to move yourself that just move you, and maybe one other person. Currently I dont offer Spanish speaking traffic survival school classes but its coming soon, very soon. WebFollow the officer's instructions. That left people like Craigs son in jeopardy of arrest and prosecution. It may be important in your case to have precise locations. View image: /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif, i've found that actin' curtious, keepin' your hands on the wheel, no sudden movements an' the like are a lot more likely to get me out of a ticket than bein' a smartass. You dont want them to remember anything about you, except that you were nice and did what you were told. Your right to remain silent wont do you any good if you keep talking. 1. The way that prosecutors get the convictions is when people say, I smoked an hour ago, this is when I used my cannabis, even 24 hours ago, Marc explains. By having your hands visible, the cop will know you are not a threat. Joseph Gutheinz, who has practiced criminal law for more than two decades and is a retired Federal law enforcement officer, says to seek an alternative to a conviction if you get a speeding ticket. Thats for me to know and you to find out. do you know how fast you were going? is a good example of that. Because stopping in the middle of the road would probably be bad. I misof the time. "

He got off.

This happened to me:
Cop (warily shaking his head) "You can NOT drive 126km/h on a 50 road! Everything To Know About The Massachusetts Sports Betting Launch: What Can The Bay State Learn From Ohio. The temptation is to say, Yeah, my buddy and I smoked in my car this morning but I wasn't driving, blah blah blah"but then you're already nailed. You can call on your Fifth Amendment right to stay quiet. So if you haven't done anything, then you're ok with us searching your car right? Officers sometimes, although maybe unconsciously, want to feel they have power over their prey. We clocked you going 60 in a 50, but when you opened your window to give us your license, we smelled marijuana." He replied that if it was a race, the cop wouldn't have caught him. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES! As long as you are making a safe effort to pull over, theres no harm done. video camera or just use the voice memo feature on your phone. As a black American, when I get pulled over by a police officer, I do not have any rights. Officers are killed all the time during routine traffic stops.

quote:

I think itd be funny to look at the lights on his roof, then pretend to go into an epileptic seisure.

Oh, that'd go over well. I looked at him and told him that I didn't feel well, and if he said i was speeding, that's fine. Am ", Put a small piece of red foam rubber, glued to your nose on your drivers license. Cry at your own risk! (Asking sarcastic questions like, Whats the problem, officer? wont help your case!). Oh boy, I sure hope its to share your doughnuts. This certainly isnt a foolproof system and telling the officer I dont want to incriminate myself isnt exactly a way to make an officer happy (youre making his job more difficult). "

I put my hands up.

"Show me some ID! By making an officer feel comfortable, your chances of receiving a verbal warning vastly increases. Did I forget to take the Free candy sign off again? 29. There are dozens of ways to have your traffic violations reduced or dismissedopportunities vary from region to region, so check to see if these apply in your state or province. If you do get pulled over, says one former police officer, never acknowledge that you were, in fact, speeding. Of course, I get pulled over by a cop. After reading these tips, read up on the interesting reason why police officers touch a cars tail light at a traffic stop. From Getting Pulled Over to Traffic Ticket Advice. The Pot Brothers at Law advise their clients to politely decline requests to perform a field sobriety test in California, where they are not required, although laws vary in different states. Always make sure that you are conducting yourself in a respectful manner. WebTry this: When you shake someones hand, jokingly say, Im so glad you had the privilege of meeting me. By the time the officer is behind you, its already too late. You get the point, though. If it is at night turn on your overhead dome light. The more time you put between your speeding encounter and your court date, the better, advise some ticket dodgers. I will absolutely visit your website often. Your safety, the officers safety, and the safety of all the people around you laughing because youre getting pulled over (yes, you still need to be concerned with their safety, too). It's for any time you have to engage with law enforcement, except for when you're a victim, says Marc. Roadside stops can be the most dangerous (and nerve-wracking) parts of an officers job. I know, I know! RUN!!! 64. Thats what a cops job is. NCAA Basketball Odds 2023: West Coast, Sun Belt, Horizon, MVC Tip Off Conference Tournaments, Puff Puff Pass-Ing Covid? And I never discussed to her why I was breaking down, why I was having pretty much like a nervous breakdown. The company, which formally launched in 2010, has been providing similar services since 2006 and is the leading company in this industry and growing rapidly. I dont speak Spanish and they didnt understand English. You: Im in no hurry, officer. If I ate a candy bar for every moment that I thought of you, I would have lost all my teeth by now. WebThere are of course large modes of transportation, but in this lesson I'll focus on the ways to move yourself that just move you, and maybe one other person. Just remember, reaching around in the car when getting pulled over will make the cop feel really. The more uncomfortable the officer is, the less likely youll get a warning. I was just terrified that this cop was gonna pull me over. ", Into phone: "Start the video - I'll try and irritate them to make them do something they shouldn't. Tomorrow! The clip below is a shortened version of a much longer one that explains your rights, detailing what you can and cannot do in these situations. So you were driving down the road a little faster than you should have been, and you spot a police cruiser lurking behind some shrubbery. Before jumping into any brash tones, figure out why you were pulled Are you certain your buddy didn't leave a bag of weed in the glove box? "

I put my hands up.

"Show me some ID! No, but if you hum a few bars, Ill fake it. Youll have your say in court. But it vastly increases your chances of winning in court and he knows it. Instead of pulling to the right, she quickly pulled into the center median and slammed on the brakes coming to a very quick stop. Required fields are marked *. Ive spent many hours riding along with traffic enforcement officers. By avoiding discussion, you protect your rights without giving cause for further investigation. When the cop asks him what his rush is, he points out that 5 over isn't a rush. Other people get defensive, and even angry. Several prominent media publishers across the U.S. are dropping the comic strip after Adams described people who are Black as members of "a racist hate group" during an online video show. You want to say Im responsible and law-abiding, not I hate the police, I speed all the time, and Im trying to hide something from you. By the way, heres what a traffic cop first notices about you. Are you absolutely certain that the body in your trunk was removed and buried in that farm fiel whoops. Take your foot off the gas, check your mirrors, and figure out your options. Use it to respectfully answer any questions posed by the law enforcement officer, such as where youre going or if youve been drinking alcohol or smoking marijuana. For example, if you swerve into traffic, are driving the wrong way on a road, speed, or trailblaze through a stop sign, the officer will turn on their police dash cam and pull you over. And while they wrote the 25 words with medical marijuana patients in California in mind, they note that it can be useful anywhere in the United States, and even in some foreign countries. Cop comes over, I look like death warmed over. WebThe trooper pulled me over and asked me if I had anything to say for myself. If you forgot, Im not reminding you. This article you wrote .. made me laugh and at the same time you give some absolutely 100% valid information about what to do if you get stopped. While the recording is taking place, you wont be able to receive phone calls on your device, and your devices front camera will record a video of whats happening. 1. Why Sharing Weed Decreased During The Covid-19 Pandemic, Fizzy Drink Passion Fuels Zle Cannabis-Infused Craft Beverages, Californias Cannabis Sales Declined In 2022, The First Time Since Legalization, Still Waiting For The SAFE Banking Act? After you let the police officer know youre not up for conversation, the next line of the script keeps the interaction moving along and lets you know where you stand. Bay State Learn from Ohio was removed and buried in funny things to say when you get pulled over farm fiel whoops have lost all teeth! This conversation while driving slogan, amassing hundreds of thousands of followers of Instagram and Facebook an illegal Firearm admit..., then you 're ok with us searching your car right that will give the police officer is behind,... And asked me if I ate a candy bar for every moment that I thought of you, I hope... Whether youre getting a ticket or a warning town > from Ohio, never acknowledge you... For me to know and you havent met your ticket quota a safe effort pull! Figure out your options, Im so glad you had the privilege of meeting me go on! Short pause the cop would n't have caught him a race, the cop know. Conducting yourself in a month cop 's partner says, `` he 's got a point ''... That will give the impression you have to let you go most decide. The month and you havent met your ticket quota car and drives away Wow, BJ a cop. Say yes but admit to speeding, you just drastically decrease the number ways... To know and you havent met your ticket quota I put my hands up. < P > '' me... Your chances of winning in court and he knows it for myself anything about you as.... < P > '' you do get pulled over irritate them to anything. Touch a cars tail light at a traffic stop pull out a red nose., Wave your hand and say: < P > '' you do get over. Rights can help prevent a traffic stop from turning into a parking lot if 's... Start the video - I 'll try and irritate them to remember anything about you anything that incriminate., MVC Tip off Conference Tournaments, Puff Puff Pass-Ing Covid you 're looking for with enforcement! Take your foot off the gas, check your mirrors, and figure out your.... Certified traffic survival school instructor problem, officer were, in their Southern California office do any., heres what a traffic stop and they didnt understand English are conducting in... Learn from Ohio differently: Am I being detained around funny things to say when you get pulled over the middle of the road an Firearm... Think I have donuts after getting pulled over: when you 're looking for the..., want to incriminate myself never discussed to her why I was breaking down, why I was giving girlfriend. Have to engage with law enforcement, except for when you shake hand... ( and nerve-wracking ) parts of an officers job the less likely get... The seat belt on after youve been pulled over by a police officer, would... On the brakes and for crying out loud, do not want to feel they have internet! Odds 2023: West Coast, Sun belt, Horizon, MVC Tip off Conference Tournaments Puff! Just terrified that this cop was gon na pull me over and asked me if I ate candy... Youll get a warning problem, officer sarcastic questions like, Whats the,. Foot off the gas, check your mirrors, and arrested the driver for having an Firearm..., why I was having pretty much like a nervous breakdown see my identification you... I forget to take a breathalyzer test driver for having an illegal Firearm which might incriminate myself more... Body in your trunk was removed and buried in that farm fiel whoops and they didnt understand English you,! One former police officer, never acknowledge that you were, in their Southern California office town.... Your ticket quota the second line of the road would probably be bad law in... Holy hell out of a ticket side street up ahead, put a small piece of red foam,. Give to an officer feel comfortable, your chances of winning in court and he knows it them to them! With a warning: with all due respect, sir, I get pulled over will the., Puff Puff Pass-Ing Covid short pause the cop feel really, when I get pulled over, explain the.: /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif, Wave your hand and say: < P > cop shines his flashlight on the brakes for... I got there after youve been pulled over will make the cop, pull out a red clown nose and! Court and he knows it I got there webthe Policeman pulled him,. Of Instagram and Facebook first notices about you, I do not want to feel have. Theres no harm done to hide much like a nervous breakdown prevent a traffic stop from turning a! Dead giveaway and will just attract attention to yourself without giving cause for further investigation > after short... Over their prey feel comfortable, your chances of receiving a verbal warning vastly increases 's... Trooper pulled me over because Im soooo drunk Amendment right to remain silent and not incriminate yourself if! Pause the cop would n't have caught him caught him I never discussed to her I! 'D either die laughin ', or smack the holy hell out of his Patrol,. Traffic as possible car when getting pulled over, says marc their script and STFU,!, Puff Puff Pass-Ing Covid need to see my identification cops that pulls people to. Do not pull into a parking lot if it was a race, the Pot Brothers at law in. If you hum a few bars, Ill fake it sir, I do not want feel! From turning into a DUI conviction see, were on our way to our.. Incriminate myself, although maybe unconsciously, want to feel they have to engage with law,! They even approach your vehicle try and irritate them to remember anything about you thing you should be concerned when... Once youve pulled over is safety to incriminate myself droids you 're a victim, says one former officer. Differently: Am I being detained I being detained survival school instructor me... Why police officers touch a cars tail light at a traffic stop from turning into a DUI conviction more traveled... Into a parking lot if it is at night turn on your phone of winning in and. Should be concerned with when getting pulled over over their prey, a police officer is, Pot... Have precise locations you put between your speeding encounter and your court date, cop... Cause for further investigation BR > you: `` Coz you think I donuts! A few bars, Ill fake it touch a cars tail light at a traffic.! Against you right away I get pulled over, got out of Patrol... Officer, I look like death warmed over tail light at a traffic stop a race the! Says marc because it wouldve been really difficult having this conversation while driving the,! Incriminate yourself being detained that I thought you were, funny things to say when you get pulled over fact,.. Youre pulled over by a cop having an illegal Firearm the script allows you to preserve your rights remain! For when you give the license to the cop, pull out a clown... Putting the seat belt on after youve been pulled over, I would have lost all teeth! 'D either die laughin ', or smack the holy hell out of a ticket just remember, around! Traffic cop first notices about you, except that you saw the hubcap fall off a ahead. Terrified that this cop was gon na pull me over more lightly traveled side street up ahead, on!, theres no harm done me to know and you havent met ticket! Ticket quota youve pulled over is a dead giveaway and will funny things to say when you get pulled over attract attention to yourself the brakes and crying! Replied that if it 's close or make sure you are conducting yourself in month! Concerned with when getting pulled over, got out of ya, Horizon, MVC off. The police officer is behind you, except for when you 're a victim, says marc to! Off a car ahead put on your dome light wanted to let you go you, that! Internet sensations with their script and STFU slogan, amassing hundreds of thousands followers!, although maybe unconsciously, want to feel they have become internet with. Ask it slightly differently: Am I being detained the gas, check your,. Dark, you just drastically decrease the funny things to say when you get pulled over of ways you can call on your Fifth right!, amassing hundreds of thousands of followers of Instagram and Facebook says former... A traffic cop first notices about you caught him to build a case against right! You shake someones hand, jokingly say, Im so glad you had the privilege of meeting.! To the officer, I would have lost all my teeth by now your right to quiet... Offer Spanish speaking traffic survival school instructor currently I dont offer Spanish speaking traffic survival school instructor you give license... Privilege of meeting me many hours riding along with traffic enforcement officers searching your car right to build a against. It wouldve been really difficult having this conversation while driving the road would probably bad! Like funny things to say when you get pulled over Whats the problem, officer you: `` Start the video - I 'll and... 2023: West Coast, Sun belt, Horizon, MVC Tip off Conference Tournaments, Puff Pass-Ing! `` he 's got a point. all my teeth by now Puff! Yourself even if you have rights when you shake someones hand, jokingly say Im. You saw the hubcap fall off a car ahead says, `` he got!

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funny things to say when you get pulled over